Blessingway, or Babyshower reversed

The tradition of Babyshower is well established in all over the world. It is an event organized before the arrival of a newborn. As the name suggests, it focuses on the child – gifts are for the baby, gadgets are also for children, even a cake, fortunately or unfortunately for the future mother, often is diaper-like and inedible. This is usually one of the last opportunities before giving birth to meet friends to exchange gossip and spend these carefree moments together.

When I mention my Babyshower I get emotional – there were balloons, lanterns, cocktails, delicious dishes, alcohol-free and alcoholic wines, there was an edible cake and there were gifts and photos. There was me and my tremendous belly, there were women and girls who I love, who are important in my life and for whom I am important as well. It was an exceptional event.

Was there anything missing? Absolutely not! But when my friend’s Babyshower was drawing near, I felt that it would be worth doing something just for her. First of all, I thought about a gift – so that in this toy-baby- linen madness there was a little something for her as a woman, not just a future mother. But is that enough? After all, you should have absolutely everything you desire at the threshold of a birth. I know that this is an inappropriate comparison, but it should be compared with something like a “last meal”; before the execution. I have come to the conclusion that it is unfair – the baby has a babyshower even before the birth, while dad has permission to attend a post-birth party with his friends (in Polish – also called Babyshower). And mum? It turns out that there is an American (of course) tradition, which puts mum at the centre of attention – Blessingway, also called Mother’s Blessing. This ritual comes from the North American tribe of Navajo, which used to consist in performing complicated prayers over a woman expecting a child. Nowadays, the purpose of such a ceremony is to prepare us for this new role on the spiritual level.

How do we do this?

Separate date

If we are to focus on the mother, let’s not join the event with babyshower if it is planned. Let’s have a separate meeting, maybe even a surprise. Let it be a special day!

Preparing your home

Let’s create the mood – light the candles, buy fresh flowers, let’s take care of the musical setting. A good atmosphere is the foundation of well-being.

Preparing the mum

On that day, the mother-to- be should feel special. For this purpose we can prepare a homemade spa just for her, organize make-up or manicure, pay for a massage or her favourite beauty treatment. If it’s not too risky, you can make an appointment with a hairdresser. Another alternative is simply doing your hair together and offering our heroine a flower wreath.

Food for thought

Let’s sit down, talk and recall. Just like that. Unity Ribbon (hmm?) However silly it may sound, it is supposed to be a symbol. Let’s have a ribbon prepared, which each of the girls will put on their hands and take off only after the mother has begun giving birth. In this symbolic way, we will show her that we are joining her in anticipation. Memorabilia Of course, let’s give the future mother a gift – a new lipstick, a mascara, a blouse (not the one for breastfeeding), a handbag (not just a stroller bag) – so that she doesn’t forget about her femininity. But at the same time let’s prepare some souvenirs – wishes to be read after childbirth, fridge magnets, which each girl will decorate. Let there be a small souvenir left after this day.

Food and drink (obviously!)

Everybody knows that a pregnant woman can’t be denied food unless you want to be devoured by mice – let’s make sure she has a feast for the palate. These are just a few suggestions – of course, the plan of the event depends on what the future mother’s preferences are. We can organize belly painting, Pregnancy-Belly Casting (only where to hold such a piece of art afterwards?), dancing, singing, praying, watching a movie together (make sure these aren’t videos from labour on YouTube!) – everything that will make the future mother feel your warmth and support is allowed.

Let us celebrate the fact that her body has become someone’s home and the whole world for many months. And at the same time let us give her the feeling that she is a woman, our colleague, friend, sister and that we are with her now and will be later. That really means a lot.


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