“Happy mom means happy baby.” Nonsense.

The truth is that a baby is happy when its mom is nearby.

Let’s start with the fact that each of us has different needs in this matter. Each of us needs something different to feel fulfilled. For most of us, the role of a mother is just one of the roles we want to play in our lives. For some, the most important thing is career, for others it’s a relationship with a loved one. All the answers are correct here. There are also women for whom motherhood itself is the most significant role in society.

I’m one of them. Like Wonder Woman – I am Mother Woman.

In principle, all the other roles that I play in life serve as ornaments, supplements to this one, the most important. However, it doesn’t mean I have no ambition and I want to be just that all my life. I used to live without a child and I was pretty good at it.

I’ve always wanted to create. Probably this very need has motivated me to get a job when I felt I was ready for it. Return to work after maternity leave is less painful now than a few years ago. We can enjoy quality time with our child a little longer. Caring for a toddler is not a walk in the park. It’s easier to compare it to going through a ton of coal. And the pay is zero. By the way, setting the issue of dough aside, even though cash is usually the most determinant factor, the decision to return to work for most of us is, to varying extent, difficult.

I’m still under the impression that I have abandoned my children even after a year and a half, and my younger daughter is almost three years old. For some mothers, their job is another child and they feel lucky to be able to both look after a baby and work right after birth. Each of us feels this topic differently, and it’s okay. It’s important to feel good about your decisions.

I’m happy to be a working mom because work provides me with a different perspective. It gives me financial freedom. A little rest and independence. I try to spend the few hours I have left every day as close to my children as possible, and I don’t want to waste that time on anything else, even if it is something I need in order to lift my mood. He winds me up when I hear the slogan “happy mom means happy baby” because the truth is that a baby is happy when its mom is nearby. Children don’t need anything else to be happy. And this slogan is exploited too often. I don’t claim that we are to be locked in shackles and be slaves of maternity 24 hours a day until the child becomes an adult. Each of us deserves a moment of relaxation and to be alone with our thoughts from time to time. As far as I’m concerned, it means that we’re obliged to maintain a healthy balance. Because we are as much important as the child. But when it comes to women who work full time, and yet they attend yoga sessions, language workshops and on
weekends they drop their children at the grandparents’ to get some rest, I wonder whether I should suggest giving their children up for adoption.

Child can’t be a supplement to life. This slogan has become an excuse for some women. And according to certain mothers, this moment of peace, which every one of us dreams of, should last practically all the time. You can’t have your cake and eat it too. Even more so, get a great shape afterwards.

Dear Moms, especially those exhausted after work, you deserve a medal, you deserve a golden crown, you deserve a rest. But you may have to wait a bit until you get it all. It might take a long time. Unfortunately, the universe favours balance. Fatigue comes in the same package with those sweet feet, small hands entwining our necks and every “I love you, mom”. It must have been on the contract somewhere, in small print probably, because I didn’t read it, either.

It will be easier for You and Your children to be together when you come to terms with it. And instead of thinking again about your unfulfilled evening plans and how much you’ve had enough of everything, consider that for your child you are the centre of the universe. And the only thing it wants, is to be close. So even if your day is difficult, the drama at work gets overwhelming and you hate everything, just hold your little treasure tighter. These few years when they actually need you will pass so fast, that it will be too late to show them that you are always there for them before you know it. Because that’s how it is, right?

 

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